Oct 1 Mon - John 10

Oct 2 Tues - James 1

Oct 3 Wed - Mt 7

Oct 4 Thr – James 3

Oct 5 Fri - Mt 12

Oct 6 Sat – Mt 20

PRAYER: A - Adoration (prayer of centering; focus on God's goodness)

C - Confession (prayer of repentance and asking for God's forgiveness)

T - Thanksgiving (prayer of gratefulness, content, joy, avoiding pessimism)

S - Supplication (prayer for others; then pray for yourself)

S - STOP and listen... give God some time to speak to you --- end with the LORD'S PRAYER

A. Human (thus sinful/broken) Condition? = we are terrible listeners. Why?

- Pride (we think we know everything): Prov. 8:13, God hates pride

- Prejudice (assume we know better than others): Mt. 7:1-5, "Don't judge"

1. Pride and Prejudice seek only to be understood (no concern for them)

B. Christian Response = Care for them, Humility, and a Desire to Listen/Learn

- John 10:27, "My Sheep listen to My voice" - Do you care to listen to God?

C. Your personal walk w/Jesus = ALWAYS transfer/apply to marriage/family

- Covey, "Seek to understand, then seek to be understood."

- James 1:19-25, "Quick to Listen. Slow to Speak. Slow to anger."

Why the Bible says this? Because you "naturally" won't/don't do it.

4 Natural/Human Condition Responses that are not Listening

1. Evaluating (assessing, appraising, analyzing, etc)

2. Advising (trying to solve it)

3. Probing (an investigation, so that you can advise)

4. Interpreting (explaining it from your perspective)

- All 4 are prideful judgments, or working towards a judgment

D. 2 Christian Response against Judging/prejudice

1. Mt 7:12, Care about their Opinions as Much as You Care about Your own

2. Tame Your Tongue (use language/communication to express love vs. pride)

James 3:1-10, Tongue = Bit-Rudder-Spark – directs horse, ship, and starts fire

- Tongue is disproportionately powerful (to rest of body) for either good or evil

- “Sticks & stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me”? WRONG

E. How to tame your tongue"?

1. Your daily walk with Christ - Only God can heal Your Human Condition/Sin

- What comes out of your mouth, is a direct reflection of the state of your soul

- Mt 12:33-35 - out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.

- pure speech comes only from pure heart. So key = get your life right w/God

2. Learn How to Engage Effective Communication (listening skills)

- via Communication itself (5 Levels: a. Surface Issues; b. Facts about Things; c. Sharing Thoughts and Opinions about the World; d. Sharing Feelings/Needs about Other people; e. Sharing Feelings and Needs about Yourself)

- Engage Questions (rather than statements), especially open-ended questions

- Coach (asks questions) vs. Consultant (provides answers)

- Questions - trusts, believes, hopes in, listens to ... them (it's not about you!)

F. When accomplished, then seek to be understood (Mt 20:16; 1st shall be last)